Avoiding Gangrene.

One could say that I very rarely post to my SL blog, unless I have something to obsess over that makes my avatar look a certain way.  Hair, skin, clothes.  You name it,  if it goes on my body I have kvetched and ranted about it.

But you know something? I'm done caring about the substance of my content here.  it just so happens that one of the things I love about Second Life is customizing my avatar, and building a very unique avatar that expresses my inner geekness.

It seems that once I get something right, it stays put.  After all that hair I purchased, I wear the same hair just about every day, and I hate it when I take it off.  Inspite of skin tinting issues in different lighting and on different computers, I have dearly loved my prim feet.  But cold weather comes...  and I must consider wearing shoes again. sure, my leopard skin maenad cloack, will bea easy enough, as will be lengthening my chitons,

So being the tool that I am,  I have been researching online just what the greeks, who prefered not to wear shoes at all, would wear during the winter, and it turns out it is just a fur lined sandal really (snow not being much of an issue for them)  But oh...  if only I could reproduce some of these shoes.

I'm in love with both pairs! so naturally to the marketplace I went with my keywords, expecting nothing,  but imagine my surprise when I found this!

Toes and everything!  (as the only toed being in my family,  I have come to really love prim toes.  And I can have these sandals for the low, low price of L$3999

*sigh*

Alas,  I already have something very similar to this:

But

In my inventory from Caverna Obscura.  They were pretty much my staple before I got the prim feet,  but oh, how I shall miss toes.   But my old leather sandals are copy/mod, so maybe if I find some bargain toes...

Speaking of prim body parts, I have decided to "make" my own prim infant.  I found a full perm kit on xstreet for less than most scripted baby.  And since I don't need a super scripted baby, this is a good alternative.  Like an almost real newborn, it will develop as we go.  Though I am a little intimidated by the project now that I have all the sculpt maps.

So naturally, as I work on my most narcissistic accessory. there will be something to post about again!

At least these come with instructions

Recently, a dryad and her husband went off to a quiet place, in the privacy of their travels, they let nature do what she does best. No pretend clinics, midwives, doctors or expensive pretend packages. Just using the opportunity of moving in Real Life, to do a fade to black birth, the purchase of the best prim baby I could find and a few edits to my skin made it all possible.

The Prim baby I chose is what most prim baby manufacturers consider a sort of filler product. It's basically a baby, minimally scripted. It makes some unoffensive noises at random intervals. And does nothing. While my purchase is intended for the brief period of delivery and care of a newborn, This is pretty much all I need in a Prim baby.

There are several reasons people find prim babies annoying, or creepy. But some of the reasons *I* personally (a consumer of such products) find most of these products so despairing, is not just due to the spam, or the way the soviet baby plays you. It is the lack of care that go into these highly scripted, meticulously built systems.

I will give you actual examples of things I have encountered during demos, and being around gigantic pregnant barbie dolls. I'm not going to name product names.

[Prim baby] starts to feel tired and very sleepy

[Prim baby] whines cause her diaper needs to be changed.

[Prim baby] feels her tummy growl...is hungry

Now, I'm no spelling or grammar nazi (far, far from it) but I do draw the line at spell checking a product that took so much effort to sculpt, build and script. This must be done, otherwise you get tosh like you see above. Someone went to all that trouble, and didn't feel the need to correct these errors? Such as.

Baby is feeling tired. (and/or sleepy)
-surely no one is so stupid that they need both "tired" and "sleepy "to get the message across that someone needs a nap.

Baby fusses and needs to be changed
- seriously, we all know that means she shit her pants. We don't need such intimate details spamming an RP session. But even worse... "cause?"  Seriously?  We couldn't crap out a "be" for that "cause?"  not even an apostrophe ('cause?)

Baby: I'm hungry
-And surely there must be some way to convey an infant is hungry, without "Tummy growl" and an ellipse that appears to cut out the rest of the sentence. Believe me I am the QUEEN of over used, and inappropriately used ellipses, and I can tell you this is taking the piss.

There are plenty of other instances, where I have seen something that made me want to go put my old body back on. I remember once, a woman with a talking tummy landed with something of a thump, and her tummy responded

OMG (name) be careful! your pregnant!

Yeah. Apparently tummies not only know how to talk, but also know internet slang, but not the difference between your and you're.

(for the record, the only "tummy" I wore was one I made myself, out of a prim, and a very easy script that reminded people it did not talk, when it was touched. No one touched, unless I asked.)

Like I said, I am not a grammar nazi, in fact I am kind of the opposite of such. I figure if you know what someone is saying, it is good enough for me. You sort of *have* to be that way when you have real life kids with disabilities. But even so, my kids will get help with spelling and grammar if doing a report, or a review online. Which just goes to show... there are times when you need to pay more attention to these things.

I wish I could say my prim offspring search was over. I figure I can get more miles out of my delivery baby, because we mythological types tend to think we live and stay young forever. But eventually, I will need to upgrade. Zooby's could be the winner (If I purchase, still debating other options!). *shrug* They are at least somewhat modifiable, unlike the infant I purchased. In order to give her a crappy set of twigs and a pacifier, I had to create a separate attachment for lower left arm. It works alright for now, but not in the long run.

So they all rolled over and one fell out.

I haven't put in an entry in a really long time, and I have a long list of excuses. My favorites are that my husband suffered a bout of serious illness and needed surgery to unblock an artery (at the ripe old age of 40!)

...and we moved to across the Atlantic to an island where it rains a lot, and the letter 'U' is used gratuitously. In the words of Lisa Simpson "It's a bit of a mystery, yes. But if you look at the clues, you can figure it out." Needless to say I am missing my friends terribly!

So, a lot of change in our real life, and some changes in our SL too. one of our SL kids, decided not to be a SL anything, anymore. It was a drama free departure (if not a little awkward for us both, I would imagine) And she has our blessing, of course. However it does leave us with a sticky situation as far as storyline, and just general "Hey, how is/where's your kid?" I guess good old fashioned (( Out of Character parenthesis speak indicating that she has moved on and we wish her the best, lets not speak of this again)) will have to suffice. I do wish she had chosen a way to write her own exit, however.

Chapter opened and closed, with good times had. The problem *I* am left with, is I did that thing that mothers (In Real Life as well as Second Life) should never, ever do. I allowed too much of my Second Life fall around being a mother. In the process chipped away from the nymph, and the Maenad/Bacchante became things 'I only am, since I once was." In some ways it can't be helped, a tremendous amount had been written to include every member of our family, and make sure everyone and everything had a place and an explanation.

I realize now, that a few weeks have passed, that a lot of the reasons I chose Second Life motherhood, is my husband and I are often too busy to meaningfully connect in Second Life, even though our real lives are very happy, and we both enjoy the work we do in Second Life. Technically we shouldn't need to have a romantic relationship in Second Life, but, a sucker for RP is not much more than a cry for in character attention!

At times I think "It would also be nice to be nymphy, and seductive (of my Centaur) and wild without the example I am laying out for my children." Lots to consider.

I realize that depending on how I go about things, I have an opportunity to try something new, find a new interpretation of myself. What those things are? I don't honestly know. I can say this much, I will not be adopting again unless the other party was an existing friend and confidant, and I am hesitant to carry on with my prim-pregnancy (though at this time I have plans to carry on through the month of September as planned. A lot of work has been done towards this.)

But damned if it isn't hard to "unwrite" or "write-out" a kid in SL. Or a little sister, or an aunt. Writing out a lover (even a long term one) is less complicated than moving on sans child. I could go for heavily melodramatic excuses such as kidnapping, loss of life, mystery of unknown location, but these things would require me to be melancholic at best, and that is not why I log into Second Life. I didn't create a reveler so I could sulk.

In Second Life, we are lucky to be whatever it is that we want to be, but in many ways it is so difficult to erase, or tear up those portions of a character that just didn't work out the way you had thought, like you can on a paper character sheet. As I said before; Out of Character parenthesis speak indicating that she has moved on and we wish her the best, will have to suffice for the time being.

The Village Blacksmith

Under a spreading chestnut-tree
The village smithy stands;
The smith, a mighty man is he,
With large and sinewy hands;
And the muscles of his brawny arms
Are strong as iron bands.

His hair is crisp, and black, and long,
His face is like the tan;
His brow is wet with honest sweat,
He earns whate'er he can,
And looks the whole world in the face,
For he owes not any man.

Week in, week out, from morn till night,
You can hear his bellows blow;
You can hear him swing his heavy sledge,
With measured beat and slow,
Like a sexton ringing the village bell,
When the evening sun is low.

And children coming home from school
Look in at the open door;
They love to see the flaming forge,
And hear the bellows roar,
And catch the burning sparks that fly
Like chaff from a threshing-floor.
He goes on Sunday to the church,
And sits among his boys;
He hears the parson pray and preach,
He hears his daughter's voice,
Singing in the village choir,
And it makes his heart rejoice.

It sounds to him like her mother's voice,
Singing in Paradise!
He needs must think of her once more,
How in the grave she lies;
And with his hard, rough hand he wipes
A tear out of his eyes.

Toiling, -- rejoicing -- sorrowing,
Onward through life he goes;
Each morning sees some task begin,
Each evening sees it close;
Something attempted, something done,
Has earned a night's repose.

Thanks, thanks to thee, my worthy friend,
For the lesson thou hast taught!
Thus at the flaming forge of life
Our fortunes must be wrought;
Thus on its sounding anvil shaped
Each burning deed and thought.

-The Village Blacksmith
--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Before my Husband even revealed his smithy soul to me, (Which is a real life thing too, btw. He's a metal smith without a smithy) I've loved this poem since I first heard it. I swear I can smell the leaves of that spreading chestnut tree, feel the coolness of the shade and the heat from the forge.

My poor brain and alternate personalities.

I was going to try and pimp up my blog a bit when I moved to Wordpress, do some IC posts, that sort of thing. But I am finding myself very self conscious about writing in public. You see, I used to be a very, very good writer. No, seriously, I was. I have several novels sitting on my hard drive, and just because they are not published does not make them terrible. For a while, I even had a following of readers, and while it was not many, they were all intelligent people who I was flattered to have the attention and praise of.

Whether it be my medications, or the inevitable slight decline of my cognitive function as a result of my illness, I notice I don't write as well as I used to. Every time I write a sentence that only makes sense to me, or reads wrong to someone else, I cringe. This is just in day to day communications. Then again, there has always been a difference between how I write/blog, and how I write/storytell. I think I am as good a Storyteller as I ever have been, it's just the technical function I struggle with these days.

So I don't know. Maybe I will give myself the permission to suck again (as I did when I first started writing in front of people) and give it another go. Given that I am also trying to teach myself how to spell in a different dialect, I might just need to choose my battles carefully.

But in Second Life we live in a very shallow world. Even those of us who are deep beautiful people snigger at other people's faux pas and "Fashion don'ts." So giving yourself permission to suck is about as bad as walking around with a freenis sticking out of the front of your poorly adjusted prim tutu.

Anyway... Second Life has been quiet for me, and yet busy. I am craving some RP really badly, and while I am not calling anyone out^**, I wish all the people who complain about the lack of RP would show up and do some. Mmm Kay, we don't have grid cryers, guilds, (Or dozens of micromanaged social groups for those guilds) we do not fight except in designated places, and then, rarely. These are the things that supposedly define "serious RP" and if I wanted "Serious RP" there would be dozens of other places I could go.

But I wouldn't be happy, just as dozens of people in Second Life are not happy with the politics and drama and bickering that happens in their RPs. You people are out there, I know you are, I've spoken to you. I'm just not seeing you, in order to create this alternate RP environment we want to provide and enjoy.

Seriously, people don't realize the impact they have on RPing, just by showing up and doing some. or Showing up and being *available* for some. I have learned that in Second Life, the Best RPers happen to be the ones who are most excluded from RP.

Child Avatars. Yes, they can be annoying when they are done with a lot of baby babble, yes, they even creep people out (though I theorize that has more to do with the Elder individual) but they never let down the RP, because to do so, is to walk away from what their Avatar is. I don't mind confessing that recently Eacen and I created a set of Child Alts so we could participate in some of the kid activities happening around the isles. And what an enlightening experience it has been, to see what good RPers other Child Avatars are, even if they are just dancing or splashing around in a puddle, after all, this is what children do.

My Point? I wish adults had the ability to let go of themselves a bit in world, and get in touch with the avatars they spend so much money and time on pimping out. I am as guilty of this as anyone (and it is hard when work is involved, to be a tree-lady) but I am trying. I don't know who reads this beyond a few close friends, but I would hope that if someone does, they'd realize how valuable their character ideas and imaginations are In world. Yes, your Real Lives are important too, and I like knowing the Real Life people as much as anything.

I just wish I knew some of your characters. :p

** ^{I loathe passive agressive cattyness on blogs. Was involved with a group of bloggers who excelled at it for years. What a way to ruin someone's sanity. Please note this is not my intent.}

ProudFEET

Skin tinting difficulties or not.



There is no question which looks better. I already have prim ears, why not prim feet? Look at my SLKankles disapear

Awesome picture (OoC)

Just found this stumbling around the internet



If he'd have gone to a Centaur Blacksmith from the beginning, he wouldn't be having trouble with his shoes.